Autumn Day in Japan

Hashimaki

Oyaki

Today was a wonderful day, it is a national holiday here in Japan and there are many festivities all day. My roommate, his girlfriend and I went to an Omatsuri which is a Japanese style festival. It was something that I never thought that I would come to the point in my time in Japan where I am still astonished and impressed by my surroundings. 

Grilled Mochi

I have been to many before but this one was the one of the largest and most entertaining of all. Since there was tonnes of food and games!

I ate: 1 kinds of hashimaki for the first time, squid, oyaki, chocolate covered banana, waffle stick, potatoes with mayo and mentako sauce and more. 

This is an old traditional game where you carve a shape out of candy to win actual money. I thought it looked super easy until I tried. I almost got it but then I broke it. Then ate it. 

On top of all of that I was able to join in a Mikoshi which is where the carry a family shrine down the street, I was given the festival wear and an old lady tied my golden obi.

Another video <----CLICK

On days like today I can't imagine leaving Japan.

The Change Comes from Within

Here I am pondering life and all that it entails, I am bracing myself for change. I personally don't like this feeling, I much rather just do things on a whim. Then one doesn't have to face this anticipation and self doubt if you are doing the right thing. 

It is like a consistent battle with yourself and in the end I am always disappointed I invested so much time trying to untangle my psyche. 

You know, anticipation maybe something eerie from behind is sneaking up. I am preparing for its debut, like greeting a long lost friend at the arrivals gate or possibility a life altering consultation with some head honcho.

I wish I had the motivation, passion and most of all inspiration to have written something of substance at that time of my initial departure. So that I could sit back and reflect while I stare at the clouds. No time to be wishing for things one cannot change.

A lot of time has been invested conversing with many people about what happens next. Or what is inadvertently the best 'decision' one can make. 

At one point I was avidly asking everyone what was the best route, throwing down my options and all the ideas that were swelling my head in hopes of an epiphany. Alas, it does not work like that. 

However, I have learnt about the "state of mind" (Like I wasn't already aware of this) How I perceive daily life places a huge factor on the level of happiness you are in. My state is in the utmost manner is luckily  underlined with gratefulness. 

Others may call it sacrifice to give up material goods, job security and most of all family/friends. Like leaving them behind is practically like throwing them away, which isn't true at all. 

If you had asked me on an off day I would have wholeheartedly would have agreed to the fact there are days where I felt like I had abandoned them. 

Though I know when times are tough they are always there for me on social media sites and if they lose touch it isn't because one of us failed to try. I used to be saddened by the fact that people would stop talking to me, but what are they going to talk to me about? I am so far away and our lives don't coincide not is relative daily banter any longer, a thing. I am sure the people I call my friends are thinking, 'Jen, will be back' and that will be the day when they will look me up and try to play catch up. The words on a screen isn't enough to fulfill a friendship. 

Now it is time again to make decisions that lead my life onto the next unforeseen location. My count down begins now and I have to prepare myself mentally and thank all the people that have been talking to me, supporting me through my hard times. You are not forgotten, I am just sometimes a little more lost than usual.

Lost and Found In Tokyo

I came here 14 months ago having this ubiquitous idea of what Japan would be like. My eyes were glazed over and the time had finally come to step off the plane and see through the elongated talks that has taken place throughout the previous years. 

Tokyo itself wasn't at all what I thought it would be but in a sense it was. How you may ask? I believed before landing that it would be like a surreal city landscape taken out of over animated films based in Japan, specifically Tokyo. Man was I hit in the face with reality, the incandescent lights flourished beyond my belief and I was smacked with the sobering realization that it wasn't at all like how I imagined it would be.

However, the cramped back streets lined with cute lanterns and Oji/Oba-san shops were endless and the food alone warmed my soul and my stomach.  Japanese food here didn't disappoint, the glory of vending machines on every corner even in the countryside always made me smile, dehydration was never an option. :) I could rabble on and on about food but you can see that I have had taken time to explore all the convenience shops, restaurants and learned how to cook Japanese cuisine based on my previous posts, instagram and arbitrary Facebook photos. 

Working in Japan was a feat of its own, there are no lack of jobs here in this big metropolis but finding something that suited you was a whole other story. I had gone in and out of interviews like they were convince shops with newly displayed seasonal foods. Everything from English teaching, bar-tending, host clubs, tutoring, online work, editing, ski resorts, farming and my last victory voice acting. Now I am at a point where I am finally not working 7 days a week at 6 different part time jobs I can sit back and reflect. 

I had become lost in the life of a salary-man, this term applied to me since I did wake up early whilst trying to uphold a social life. Due to chasing money I feel like I had gone astray from my purpose here in Japan but I know for a fact if I hadn't done this I would be in the situation that I am now. So no regrets. 

My students taught me about culture deep past what forums and media could ever teach me about Japan. Not only was I engrossed in the culture I was truly living it, in a city of 13 million. I felt very alone at times though I was surrounded by the masses. When the culture shock and the insane schedule started to become the norm I was able to really able to relish life here. 

Traditions I had never experienced before were new opportunities around every corner. There is a holiday for everything here! From seasonal foods, festivals, dances, exhibits, a plethora of themed cafes, giant obscene displays of anime or Godzilla, the days of entertainment were endless. I was able to eat and drink things specifically for new years, make home-made chocolates followed with white day where one gets gifts in return, celebrate hanami (cherry blossom festival) like the Japanese 'drunk and full of yummy things', this list could go on and on. 

I was able to make life long friends here, fall in love, laugh so hard my cheeks hurt. True friends that have supported me and listened to my complains, concerns and tiffs with the culture. I have been lucky enough to leave Japan twice and return with newer eyes for a country I have truly fallen in love with. I am no less enamored by the wonders that this country has to offer and will hold a special place in my heart always. My infatuation hasn't lessened over time, to be honest I think it has a whole new luster to it. 

Personally I didn't think that I would ever become one of those foreigners that would want to stay here forever. You know the ones that are like, ''I came to Japan and I just never left'' there are an overabundance of them, I can understand why now. Yet by January I had applied for a working visa and the following May I was denied. I didn't give up there though, I tried again. So in June I applied again for a different working visa and today I was denied. 

Now I have 30 days before I have to leave Japan, which is what brought on this long winded post. Since my previous ones about Japan didn't really do justice to the country in anyways what-so-ever. I wanted to remind myself why I came here, why I will have to say goodbye to this chapter of my life. I am sure that I will return to Japan. 

I leave you with this last thought and I will be back to write more about my future journeys. 

''As I walk down the streets with a friend who will soon be departing, 
the street and the sunset have this ominous intensity.
The inconsequential objects around me take on a whole new shape.
The mundane and the ordinary has become extraordinary once again.
Thoughts stream through my head faster than I can perceive them and in this moment,
I lie on my roof top where the cement warms my body, I breathe fresher air.''

Thank you for anyone who has taken the time to read through this.

Much love

Jenny